Where's Agent Starling when you need her?
In other news, if anyone's seen my mother's mind, please return it to her. Because she's obviously effing lost it. She's one fava bean and chianti away from earning herself a muzzle and British actor to portray her in a creepy-ass film. (Perhaps Thandie newton would do nicely? She played a dead girl in [i]beloved[/i], surely evil won't be much of a stretch?)
She's tried everything else to "help" me lose weight. She's whined. Written nasty notes. Sent me BMI charts. Berated me in front of others. Made nasty comments. Tried bribery.
Now we're on to blackmail.
We co-own the condo I live in. (long story involving stupidity with money). Fiance (understandably) doesn't want to live in a place where she will have control. Can't say I blame him. So tonight, I explain to her that I'd like her to sign over her half of the condo to me, I'll pay whatever, etc. Her immediate answer:
"If you get down to a size 14, I'll consider it."
And I thought it couldn't get worse than "If you don't lose weight, [fiance] will leave you," and "Don't make him start looking at those slender women!"
Guess I just wasn't imaginative enough.
So now, we're considering calling the whole thing off. No wedding, just find a place of our own to live together after a quickie JOP thing. Just cut mother and her money out completely.
Pisses me off to no end that this has to be an option. But we can't afford anything near what we were planning with her help. So we're in a position now to tell everyone "sorry, wedding's off."
And as WIC/Childish/That-Other-Site as it sounds, I kinda wanted the big to-do. I wanted the ceremony, the dress, the party. And now it'll just be this sort of sad, furtive thing with just me and him cowering in our poverty. And it kind of scares me that that's what the beginning of our life together is going to be. meh. i need a drink. Or five. I've got until the end of the month to decide. Or jump off a high roof.
I hate that this has become a battle of wills instead of a joyous occasion.
I hate that I feel so fucking small and powerless.
I hate feeling so pressured. I shouldn't feel this way. This should be fun. Not pressured and angst-y.
She's tried everything else to "help" me lose weight. She's whined. Written nasty notes. Sent me BMI charts. Berated me in front of others. Made nasty comments. Tried bribery.
Now we're on to blackmail.
We co-own the condo I live in. (long story involving stupidity with money). Fiance (understandably) doesn't want to live in a place where she will have control. Can't say I blame him. So tonight, I explain to her that I'd like her to sign over her half of the condo to me, I'll pay whatever, etc. Her immediate answer:
"If you get down to a size 14, I'll consider it."
And I thought it couldn't get worse than "If you don't lose weight, [fiance] will leave you," and "Don't make him start looking at those slender women!"
Guess I just wasn't imaginative enough.
So now, we're considering calling the whole thing off. No wedding, just find a place of our own to live together after a quickie JOP thing. Just cut mother and her money out completely.
Pisses me off to no end that this has to be an option. But we can't afford anything near what we were planning with her help. So we're in a position now to tell everyone "sorry, wedding's off."
And as WIC/Childish/That-Other-Site as it sounds, I kinda wanted the big to-do. I wanted the ceremony, the dress, the party. And now it'll just be this sort of sad, furtive thing with just me and him cowering in our poverty. And it kind of scares me that that's what the beginning of our life together is going to be. meh. i need a drink. Or five. I've got until the end of the month to decide. Or jump off a high roof.
I hate that this has become a battle of wills instead of a joyous occasion.
I hate that I feel so fucking small and powerless.
I hate feeling so pressured. I shouldn't feel this way. This should be fun. Not pressured and angst-y.
posted by Gina at 12:39 AM
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